Socially Constructed pt.4

What could this mean? Confusion lingers on my mind like the irritating buzzing white noise from an old television. To combat this I throw my earphones in and focus on the mission at hand – restore my laptop to factory settings via the hardware store and put an end to the harassment. I choose an album with an upbeat tempo, which reflects my current dedicated mood. The drums and bass compliment the pace at which I am moving and before the first song is over I am dressed and out the house. Dressed in black, with a cap covering my face, backpack on my back with the important laptop.

The atmosphere outside is foggy. Ironically it harmonises with my mindset on the current situation. Even though the fog clouds my vision it holds a secretive beauty. It’s amazing how the disclosing fog has so many secrets. What hides inside it? I can see bright lights dancing through it. Though it masks my vision, I can still hear through it, birds belting out soulful harmonies. The other side to this elegance is that I feel as though the mysterious entity hides amongst it, watching my every move, tracking me by the location of my laptop. With every drum that beats through my ears I move through the fog in a rhymical manner. With every snare I look behind me and at the end of every verse paranoia takes over and I mistake one of the lights for the entity. This monster really scares me.

As the album through my ears progresses, the environment around me does too. The fog begins to clear and the mystery it once held becomes apparent. The city is vacant. Derelict. Abandoned. This creates a spooky air. Usually this place never sleeps – constant chatter and charisma can be found all year round but right now that isn’t the case. I guess it is just me, myself and I right now. By myself and I, I mean myself and the entity since it is a creation of me. As I go about my journey my footsteps come to a halt, in perfect sync with the album. Immediately I pull my phone out of my pocket and see that the brightness is very low. As I hold the phone up to eye level I see that the signal has gone, hence why the music stopped. That isn’t the only thing I see.

Through the reflection I see the entity standing behind me in the distance. Fixated on it I spin around, ready for confrontation. It begins to slowly make its way towards me. I would normally freeze up in fear but right now a passion simmers inside of me. I make my way towards this devil and we meet halfway. Much to my surprise I see emotion on its face. The look of sadness and the visual representation of neglect. This once emotionless thing seems to have developed emotion. Its eyes are filled with sorrow. In its hand is a rose. The passionate red petals contrast the grey palette of the city.

“You want to kill me” it says in a defeated tone, “But why would you want to kill something you created. I have never harmed you, I just wanted to get to know my creator is that so bad”

Suddenly my mindset on the whole situation changes. The entity never harmed me or did anything to endanger me, it just approached me in a way that is unfamiliar to any human being. But it isn’t a human being. It wouldn’t know how to abide with our way of life. Maybe it was just trying to be friendly but my fear of the unknown blinded me to it. But np. How can I trust this thing? The mystery it shrouds itself in tells me not to. On the other hand, if it wanted to harm me in any way, shape or form it surely would’ve done it by now right? At this moment in time, my defences have dropped and I have bought into the idea that the entity was just trying to be friendly with me.

“Come, I have something to show you”

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Meekah

So many thoughts pass through my head. Let me share some with you.

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